Christmas at the Movies: Home Alone

“We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way.” – Isaiah 53:6

For the Christmas season this year, our church is having some fun by taking a look at a few favorite holiday movies. Our attenders voted on their favorite Christmas films, and my job is to find a lesson from God’s word that applies to each of them. First up, we highlighted the movie that tied for third place in our congregation’s vote. Released in 1990, for 28 years it held the record as the highest grossing Christmas movie of all time. The movie? “Home Alone.”

The film tells the story of the 8-year-old troublemaker Kevin McCallister, who is accidentally left home alone while the rest of his family flies to Paris for Christmas vacation. At the beginning of this movie, let’s just say it: Kevin is a spoiled brat. He starts out by complaining, “Why do I always get treated like scum?” Through his actions, he answers his own question pretty fast. He calls his mom a “dummy.” Then he tells her, “I don’t want to see you again for the rest of my whole life.” And then he tells his whole family, “I hope I never see any of you jerks again.”

In short, Kevin is behaving like a little jerk, lashing out in anger, disrespecting his parents and rebelling against their authority. And do you know who Kevin reminds me of? He reminds me of you and me. Isaiah 53:6 comes to mind: “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” Eight-year old Kevin, like you and me, is a little sheep that went astray; like you and me, he’s turned to his own way. In the movie, Kevin’s mom is the unappreciated dumping ground for his bad behavior. In real life, Jesus Christ is the unappreciated dumping ground for ours. 

Eventually young Kevin is banished to the attic, thinking to himself, “I wish they would all just disappear.” Then overnight, a storm rolls in and the power goes out, causing everyone’s alarm clocks to stop working. The next morning Kevin’s family flies out the door to catch their plane while Kevin sleeps like a baby in the attic. Later Kevin wakes up, casually walks downstairs, and is surprised to discover the whole house is empty. He decides his wish caused some kind of Christmas miracle, and he gloats: “I made my family disappear!”

Kevin wastes no time jumping on his parents’ bed while shoving popcorn in his mouth. He runs around the house like a crazy man. He eats whatever he wants. He watches whatever “rubbish” he wants to on TV. To Kevin, being home alone is a dream come true! He feels so free!

Let me ask: Why do you and I sin? Why do we rebel against God’s laws and ignore His commands? Because it’s fun, right? Don’t deny it: Sin can be a LOT of fun. When you’re in the moment, getting drunk can be fun. Gossiping can be fun. Having premarital sex or an affair can be fun. But the fun of sin is short-lived, isn’t it? As Paul writes in Romans, 6:23 “The wages of sin is death.” In other words, sin might be fun in the moment, but it’ll end up killing you.

For the first 24 hours or so that Kevin is home alone, he has a blast. He can say anything he wants. He can do anything he wants. But after the first day, it starts to get old … especially when he finds himself in the crosshairs of two burglars who wanted to loot his house while his parents are gone. Kevin thought life with his family was just horrible. But within about 48 hours he discovers the truth: Life WITHOUT his family was what was truly horrible.

Can’t we say the same about life without Jesus? Life without Jesus ends up being really horrible. Sin seems fun for a while, but it never really satisfies us for any length of time. Only Jesus satisfies. He alone is the living water who quenches our spiritual thirst. He alone is the bread of life who answers our soul’s hunger for meaning and purpose. Only Jesus satisfies.

By Christmas Eve, Kevin is feeling pretty empty. Being home alone isn’t working out the way he imagined. And as he walks home in the dark, he passes a church and goes inside. I’m not sure we can say that Kevin has a “religious experience,” but this short church visit becomes a defining moment in Kevin’s life. As he leaves the chapel, he’s determined to stand up to the burglars and fight for his home. And even though he never says so, his wish has changed. Instead of wishing his family would disappear, he wishes they’d come back—especially the mom he dumped on just a few days earlier. And about 12 hours later (with two crooks severely beaten up and on their way to jail), Kevin’s wish comes true.

By the time his family comes home, Kevin has come to his senses. He realizes that he unfairly dumped on his mom. Deep down he loves her. He needs her. And Christmas without her is empty. I hope and pray that you’ve come to the same conclusion about your family. At times, you’ve taken your parents, your spouse or your kids for granted, and you’ve unfairly dumped on them. But deep down you realize you love them; that Christmas without your family is empty.

And Christmas without Jesus Christ is even more empty. We’ve taken Jesus for granted and dumped on him far too often. But the truth is: I need Jesus Christ in my Christmas celebration. You need Jesus Christ in your Christmas celebration. In fact, not only is Christmas empty without him—LIFE is empty without him. So, open your heart’s door and invite him back home this Christmas season. In the long-run, it’s no fun being home alone without Jesus at Christmas.

Dane Davis is the Pastor of Impact Christian Church. Join us for our holiday message series, “Christmas at the Movies,” Sundays at 10 a.m. at the new Dr. Ralph Baker School in Victorville. For more information, visit www.GreaterImpact.cc.

The Cancer of Unforgiveness

 “If you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” – Matthew 6:14-15

In 1993, a Minneapolis mother of one experienced hell on earth. Mary Johnson’s only son, eighteen-year old Laramiun Byrd, was gunned down in cold blood after a fight broke out at a party he was attending. It didn’t take long for the suspect to be arrested: sixteen-year old Oshay Israel, who was tried as an adult and sentenced to 25 ½ years in prison. Although Mary was devastated by her son’s murder, at least she knew that justice was being served. In her own words, “[Oshay] was an animal. He deserved to be caged.”

But something unexpected happened several years into Oshay’s sentence. Mary, a devoted Christian, felt led by God to visit him in prison. She did. And she visited him again and again until he was released after serving seventeen years of his sentence. And miracle of miracles: By the time Oshay was released, not only had Mary forgiven him for killing her son, she actually had become like a mother to him. Upon his release, Oshay needed a place to live, so Mary put in a good word for him with her landlord. And today, Oshay lives in the same apartment complex as Mary. In fact, he lives right next door. 

Wow! Do we serve an amazing God or what? If I wasn’t a Christian already, after hearing Mary Johnson’s testimony I’d say, “Sign me up! I want what that lady has. I want to have her kind of strength. I want to have her kind of peace. I want to be able to have the grace to forgive the way she forgives … especially when it comes to my dad.”

Sadly, my relationship with my father has been strained for a long time. We haven’t been close for many years. And that relational distance has been thrust to the forefront of my mind in recent months as my dad has struggled to bounce back from a major stroke. The stroke has crippled his ability to speak full sentences and process others’ speech. And my dad, who as long as I’ve known him has been able to fix anything with his own two hands, can barely button his own shirt or brush his own hair.  

You’d think that witnessing my father’s struggles would break my heart. But to be honest with you, my heart has been a bit calloused these past few months because of some lingering bitterness and unforgiveness. You see, I’ve never completely let go of the bitterness I’ve felt toward my dad for being physically abusive to my mom, my sister and me. I’ve never completely forgiven him for tearing me down with his words. And I’ve never completely let go of the resentment I’ve felt toward my dad for trying to chase off my wife when we were dating.

Don’t get me wrong: I have many wonderful memories of my dad. But those wonderful memories are mixed in with a lot of bad ones that have strained our relationship. And our strained relationship has become more strained because of my unforgiveness. I realize that needs to change.

Even though I’ve been a committed Christian for a long time, I still find myself longing for what Mary Johnson has. She so eloquently reminds us, “Unforgiveness is like cancer. It will eat you from the inside out. It’s not about that person. Me forgiving him does not diminish what he’s done….But the forgiveness is for me. It’s for me.”

These are wise words, powerful words, life-changing words that I need to hear. And you need to hear them as well. For me, two of the most haunting verses in the whole Bible are Matthew 6:14-15 where Jesus says bluntly, “If you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

Ouch! These verses crush me. Long story short: God will only forgive my sins against Him to the extent that I forgive others’ sins against me. And if I refuse to forgive others’ sins against me, God will refuse to forgive my sins against Him.

So, the Lord has revealed to me in recent weeks what I must do. I must forgive my dad…not just mostly. I need to forgive him completely. I need to do it for him. And I need to do it for me. Most importantly, I need to do it for my Lord Jesus Christ. He is ready and willing to forgive me. How can I possibly refuse to be ready and willing to forgive my dad?

Jesus Christ has called us to get rid of all bitterness and unforgiveness, because they are a poisonous cancer that infects our hearts, our families and our churches. Jesus Christ does NOT want us to miss the grace of God, and He does NOT want others to miss the grace of God pouring out through you and me.

If we DESIRE it, Jesus Christ will give us—just as He gave Mary Johnson--the grace to forgive the unforgiveable, to give mercy to the unmerciful and to love the unlovable. And as we share these amazing blessings with others, Jesus will respond by sharing them with us. Therefore, if you and I are serious about wanting Jesus to forgive us, we must get serious about forgiving others. And if we are serious about walking in our Lord’s footsteps, we have no choice but to eradicate the cancer of unforgiveness from our hearts. 

Dane Davis is the Lead Pastor of First Christian Church in Victorville. For more information,

visit www.YourVictorvilleChurch.com and join us for church tomorrow at 10 a.m.

Have a Better Marriage than Your Parents

“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” – Ephesians 5:33

Last week, I read a blog written by a woman who had nothing but bad memories of her parents’ marriage. She wrote, “My parents hated each other, and I mean that as in plates flying, cops turning up and thousands of memories as a child of their fighting.” She shared memories of punches, drunkenness, and a repeated cycle of breakups and failed reunions.

Even more sadly, she went on to say, “I can not help [but] feel that some of their bad habits [in] their marriage not only are still with me but will affect my marriage.” And her concern is valid. Experts tell us that most couples, without even realizing it, model their own marriage after their parents’ marriage—for better or for worse.

You may not have grown up in a household with flying plates, but if you’re like me, you had parents whose marriage wasn’t bad … but it wasn’t great either. We don’t want to make the same mistakes they made. And God’s word has the answers. It offers a major tune-up for any broken-down marriage.

In Ephesians 5:22-24, Paul offers an implied command to husbands to “lead” their wives under the authority of Jesus Christ. And wives are commanded to submit to that God-given leadership. Now, in this fallen world of ours, there is no shortage of selfish, arrogant husbands. We’ve heard husbands get onto a high horse and demand that their wives submit to them. And these husbands were—for the most part—lousy husbands.

But in the context of a godly marriage, both husband and wife are following Ephesians 5:21, which says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” And just a few verses later, Paul gives this instruction: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). In that context, a wife’s submission comes much easier.

Now, with that in mind, let’s take a look at the commands given to husbands and wives in verse 33: “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” For years I’ve found this verse to be so interesting. Notice that wives are not commanded here to “love” their husbands. And husbands are not commanded to “respect” their wives. Why not?

First, I believe it’s because it’s easy for most wives to love their husbands, and it’s easy for most husbands to respect their wives. Now, there are exceptions to the rule. But as a rule of thumb, even when a marriage is falling apart, a wife still loves her husband. And similarly, as a rule of thumb, even when a marriage is falling apart, a husband still respects his wife. But when a marriage is falling apart, more times than not the wife does not respect her husband, and the husband does not love his wife.

Second, by the same token, wives have a deeper need to be loved, and husbands have a deeper need to be respected. Even though so-called “experts” in gender studies keep on trying to deny it, the fact is, God has wired men and women differently. When conflict happens in a marriage, it’s common for husbands and wives to say things in anger that they later regret having said. When those harsh words are being spoken, a wife usually interprets her husband’s harsh words as unloving. And a husband usually interprets his wife’s harsh words as disrespectful.

And what can easily happen is this: If a wife feels unloved, she will withhold respect from her husband. And if a husband feels disrespected, he will withhold love from his wife. His unloving words feed off of her disrespect. And her disrespect feeds off of his unloving words. And thus begins a vicious cycle of withholding love and respect within the marriage. Now, here’s some good news: It takes two spouses to START this crazy cycle, but it only takes one spouse to STOP it. And the healing begins with one spouse drawing a line in the sand and refusing to pretend that God’s unconditional command is conditional.

Remember, we don’t follow the wisdom of this world. We follow Jesus Christ. Men, aren’t your grateful that Jesus loved you when you were completely unlovable? Women, aren’t you grateful that Jesus showed you enough respect to die on the cross for you even when you said and did plenty of things that were completely disrespectful?

We need to follow in his footsteps. Husbands are commanded to love their wives even their wives are disrespectful. And wives are commanded to respect their husbands even when their husbands are unloving. You and I are commanded to love and respect our spouses UNCONDITIONALLY. And when we do, living out Ephesians 5:33, your marriage could be the very best marriage your family has ever seen.

Dane Davis is the Lead Pastor of First Christian Church in Victorville. For more information, visit www.fccvv.com  and join us for worship Sundays at 10 a.m.