Can I Divorce My Non-Christian Spouse?

“‘For I hate divorce!’ says the Lord, the God of Israel. ‘To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty…. So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.” – Malachi 2:16

In Old Testament days, many of God’s followers didn’t think divorce was a big deal. Many New Testament Jews didn’t think divorce was a big deal either. And today, a growing number of Americans – and even many Christians – don’t think divorce is a big deal.

But God HATES it (Malachi 2:16). And in Matthew 19:9, Jesus says much the same thing: “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.” In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul once again makes it clear: If you are married to a Christian, you MUST stay married (vs. 10-11). If you get a divorce for any reason other than adultery, you must either stay single or remarry your ex-spouse. 

But what about Christians who are married to a non-Christian spouse? As Paul continues the chapter, he considers 2 different scenarios:

#1: Christians who are married to non-Christians who want to stay married (vs. 12-14): Paul makes it clear that when a married man or woman comes to faith in Christ, his or her Christianity shouldn’t negatively disrupt the family or tear the family apart. To the contrary, a husband or wife’s Christian faith should be a blessing to their marriage and should be a sanctifying force in their family. So, when it comes to the question of whether or not a Christian has God’s permission to divorce his/her non-Christian spouse, the answer is NO. If your non-Christian spouse is willing to stay married to you and is not committing adultery, you do NOT have God’s permission to divorce him/her.

#2: Christians who are married to non-Christians who want a divorce (vs. 15-16): In this case, Paul writes that when an unbelieving spouse chooses to walk out and abandon his/her spouse, “a believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances” (v. 15). So it seems clear that in God’s eyes, a divorce is permissible in this case. What Paul doesn’t tell us is whether or not God permits the abandoned spouse to remarry. However, if you go back to Charles Spurgeon in the 19th Century and Martin Luther and John Calvin in the 16th Century, all three respected Bible scholars taught that re-marriage was permissible for a divorcee who was the innocent party in a marriage that dissolved because of adultery or desertion.

Is God’s Word on divorce countercultural? Most definitely! And is it uncomfortable to hear? Without a doubt! But now you know the truth – right from God’s Word.

Dane Davis is the pastor of Impact Christian Church in Victorville. Join us at Impact for Sunday services: in person or online at 8:45 a.m. on Facebook Live or YouTube. For more information, visit www.GreaterImpact.cc.