A Husband’s Love for His Wife (Part 2)

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up
for her.”  – Ephesians 5:25

In the year 1141, Emperor Konrad laid siege to the castle of Weinsberg in Bavaria, Germany. Wolf, the duke of Bavaria, resisted the siege as long as possible, but the day came when he realized that he must surrender. As retribution for Wolf’s lingering stubbornness during the drawn out conflict, Emperor Konrad planned to kill every resident of Weinsberg and burn the castle to the ground.

In response, the wives of Weinsberg begged Konrad to spare the women’s lives. He consented to their request, even granting each woman permission to carry her most precious possession with her as she left the city. After all, he didn’t want the women to be a drain on society by being left penniless. So, the time came for the women to safely exit the city, and one by one, each woman walked through the city gates and filed past Emperor Konrad’s soldiers. But what Konrad and his soldiers witnessed left them speechless: Each wife walked out of the city carrying her husband on her back. Emperor Konrad was so moved by the women’s faithful love for their husbands that he spared all of the men’s lives and even chose to leave the castle standing.

As touching as this story is, it paints a vivid picture of a sad reality in many marriages today: When it comes to the responsibility spouses have to love each other, wives carry a lopsided amount of the burden. It’s far too common for husbands to relinquish their God-given duty to love their wives as Christ loves the Church, and to let their wives “carry” the relationship. 

Many husbands have a view of love that is shallow and sexualized, but Christ’s idea of love is deep and pure. Many husbands fixate on what they can get out of the marriage; Christ’s love is focused on what we ourselves can put into the marriage. Many husbands cling to a love that is temporary and conditional based on whether or not their wives deserve their love, but Christ’s love is unchanging and unconditional.

Bottom line: Christ’s love for his church is sacrificial. Therefore, a husband’s love for his wife must also be sacrificial. Ephesians 5:25 says it so plainly. “Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” A husband’s love for his wife must be sacrificial, but according to Ephesians 5:26-31, it must also be three other things.

First of all, a husband’s love must be cleansing. Just as Jesus died on the cross to wash us clean from our sins, God’s word commands a husband to similarly wash his wife. That sounds interesting, but what does it mean for a husband to wash or cleanse his wife? To put it simply, a husband’s love must lead her toward understanding and obeying God’s word, not toward distorting and disobeying it.

This begins in the dating relationship. If a young man aims to “score” with his girlfriend, he is not only planning to sin himself, but he is also breaking God’s command to love her with a cleansing kind of love. To put it simply, instead of helping to preserve her chastity for her wedding night, he is selfishly defiling it. Similarly, when a husband flirts with another woman, he is tempting his wife to become angry, bitter and spiteful toward him. Obviously this is 180 degrees from the way a husband is commanded to lead his wife. Loving husbands lead their wives closer to Christ, not closer to sin. A husband’s love must be cleansing.

Secondly, a husband’s love for his wife must be nurturing. Not only does God expect a loving husband to tend to his wife’s spiritual needs, He also expects him to tend to her physical needs. Just as a husband feeds and takes care of his own body, he must feed and take care of his wife’s body. Regardless of what kind of work a husband can or cannot do and regardless of what earning potential he does or doesn’t have, God has called husbands to do their best to take care of the physical needs of their wives. When a wife is hungry, exhausted or sick, her husband should be the first in line to nourish her with food, rest and Nyquil. A husband’s love must be nurturing.

Finally, a husband’s love for his wife must be unbreakable. In Genesis 2, God makes it clear that a husband must “cleave to” his wife. The word God uses literally means to be “glued to” or “cemented to.” So, a loving husband is responsible before God to make sure that he and his wife remain cemented together until separated by death. Sadly, our culture has replaced God’s marriage cement with Velcro. If our marriages get too difficult or we find them unfulfilling, husbands simply peel themselves off from their wives and attach to another woman. How far we’ve strayed from God’s original design for marriage! A husband’s love must be unbreakable.

It’s high time for Christian men to “step it up” in their marriages, bearing the God-given responsibility of loving their wives as Christ loves His church. A husband’s love must be sacrificial, cleansing, nurturing and unbreakable. Our marriages desperately need husbands to love their wives with this kind of love. Strong marriages depend on it.

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

A Husband’s Love (Part 1)

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”  – Ephesians 5:25

Ephesians 5:22-33 is the most misunderstood and misused passage about marriage in the whole Bible. Male chauvinist husbands have gravitated to verses 22-24, demanding that their wives “submit” to their authority. Spiteful wives have gravitated to verses 25-26, criticizing their husbands for being unloving and dropping the ball as spiritual leaders in their homes. Knowing that these Bible verses stir up frustration and arguments on both sides of the marriage aisle, many Christians avoid these verses like the plague.

But we shouldn’t sidestep this great passage. In this day and age when so many marriages aren’t “for better and for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health ‘til death do us part,” we need to get back to basics. We need to return to the Creator of marriage and read His marriage owner’s manual once again. In Genesis 1 and 2, God makes it clear that He created marriage for two key purposes: unparalleled companionship and bearing children. But in Ephesians 5:22-33, God gives specific instructions to husbands and wives about their God-given responsibilities within their marriage.

Let’s focus on the husband’s two God-given responsibilities. According to this great passage, the husband is called by God to do two things within his marriage: to lead and to love his wife. Obviously, it’s the first of these commands that ruffles the most feminist feathers. You’d be hard-pressed to find a wife who would put up a fuss about her husband loving her, but there are plenty of women—and men as well—who balk at the notion of a husband having a position of authority over his wife. After all, modern wisdom dictates that spouses should be equal partners with equal authority in their marriage.

However, I would suggest that one of the main reasons these marital commands of Ephesians 5:22-33 are so often misunderstood and misused is because people treat these twelve verses as if they parachuted out of heaven and landed randomly in the Book of Ephesians. But they didn’t. In order to properly understand these verses, we must first read and take a closer look at the first four and one-half chapters of Ephesians, which provide the backdrop for this teaching on marriage.

Long story short: A husband’s leadership in his marriage must mirror Jesus’ leadership in the church, which the first four and one-half chapters of Ephesians describe. Many of us have developed a deep suspicion and resentment toward leaders, because we’ve known leaders who were domineering and manipulative. But Ephesians 1 makes it clear that Jesus’ leadership is not like that at all. Jesus’ leadership involves giving his church every spiritual blessing (verse 3), adopting believers into his family (verse 5), spilling his blood for us so that we can avoid eternal destruction (verse 7), and lavishing God’s rich grace upon us (verses 7-8).

Therefore, if a husband is to lead as God has called him to lead, his leadership in his marriage must mirror Christ’s leadership in the church. Like Jesus, he must be a blessing to his wife in every possible way; make his wife the most important, most valuable member of his family; be willing to spill his blood for his wife, and—like Jesus—he must cover her with God’s rich grace. Now ladies, how many of you would object to this kind of leadership in your home?

And just as it’s unfair and improper for us to superimpose our own cultural understanding of leadership on this Bible passage, it’s improper for us to superimpose our own cultural understanding of love upon this passage. The truth is: the Bible’s definition of true love is much deeper and richer that our culture’s definition of love. Our idea of love today is shallow and sexualized, whereas Christ’s idea of love is deep and pure. Our culture’s love tends to be selfish and self-centered; Christ’s love is selfless and others-centered. The world’s love is focused on what I can get out of the relationship; Christ’s love is focused on what I can put into the relationship. The world’s love is temporary and conditional based on whether or not the other person deserves my love, but Christ’s love is unchanging and unconditional.

Bottom line: Christ’s love for his church is sacrificial. Therefore, a husband’s love for his wife must also be sacrificial. Ephesians 5:25 says it so plainly. It’s a wonder that we’ve overlooked it in the past: “Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” There’s no way around it: A husband is to lead his family—including his wife—but his leadership is to be marked by giving himself up. It must radiate sacrificial love.

A husband must sacrifice his own good for her good. He must, when necessary, relinquish his own rights for her rights; he must be willing to get his own hands dirty so that her hands can remain clean. He must routinely forgo meeting his own needs so that he can meet her needs. That’s the put-your-money-where-your-mouth-is kind of love that Jesus has for the church. So that must be the kind of love that a husband has for his wife. Marriages become much stronger when husbands mirror Christ in their homes by sacrificially leading and loving their wives.

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

Marriage and Questions of Final Authority

"Judge for yourselves whether it is right in God's sight to obey you rather than God." 
-- Acts 4:19

Perhaps Chief Justice John Roberts said it best as he responded to the Supreme Court’s 5-4 decision last year to legalize gay marriage in all fifty states: “Who do we think we are?” It’s a valid question because—as Roberts sees it—in one fell swoop five of his colleagues treaded upon the democratic process, states’ rights, the Constitution and a several-thousand-year-old cornerstone of civilized society. The Supreme Court’s marriage decision certainly does beg the question: “Who do we think we are?”

Our great nation was founded upon the premise that our basic human rights are God-given, and our Constitution was shaped and influenced by the Bible more than any other book. Many Americans try to argue that the United States has never been a “Christian nation,” but the evidence to the contrary is overwhelming. From the Pilgrims’ Mayflower Compact to the U.S. Constitution to the Supreme Court’s Trinity Decision of 1892, there is ample evidence that America was founded as a Christian nation upon the timeless principles of Scripture. And America’s political leaders and justices—for the first 170 years of our nation’s history—understood this and legislated accordingly.

But in recent years, America’s political leaders have moved further and further away from our nation’s Christian foundation and have begun moving—with ever-increasing speed and intensity—toward full-fledged secularism. So, have we reached a point where America has become a “post-Christian” nation? Although I hate to admit it, I believe so.

Corporate Bible reading and prayer have both been illegal in public schools for over fifty years. The Bible is no longer held as the source of absolute truth in the public square, the Capitol building or the White House. Prayers are heavily censored and—to a large extent—are just a matter of polite formality in city halls and state capitals across the nation. And Christian pastors and Christian business owners who were once respected and esteemed by elected officials are being ridiculed and prosecuted for refusing to ride the ever-growing wave of moral relativism and secularism.

Ultimately, each of us who claims to follow Christ as Lord and Savior has an important question to answer: Who is the final authority in my life? In Acts 4 when two of Jesus’ apostles, Peter and John, were commanded by the Jerusalem authorities to stop preaching and teaching about Jesus, they responded with these timeless words: “Judge for yourselves whether it is right in God’s sight to obey you rather than God.”

Obviously, Peter and John had already made their decision: If the religious and political authorities were asking them to say or do something that was contrary to what God Himself had asked them to say or do, they would obey God without batting an eye. God had called them to submit to the governing authorities up to the point that the authorities began asking them to say or do things that were against God’s word. At that point, civil disobedience was the most God-honoring response.

So, let me ask you: Who or what is the final authority in your life? Is your life theocentric (God-centered) and bibliocentric (Bible-centered) or is it anthropocentric (man-centered) and egocentric (self-centered)? In other words, are God and His word the final authority on what is right and wrong, or are you the final authority?

Sadly, the Supreme Court’s ruling last year revealed a weak link in many Christians’ views on final authority. Many Christians—knowing full well that God condemns homosexuality in both the Old and New Testaments—have chosen to ignore that reality and make the case that homosexual marriage should be praised and supported. By doing so, they have lowered the authority of God’s word while exalting their own authority. Many Christians—knowing full well that God created marriage to be a committed covenant relationship between one man and one woman—have chosen to reject His created design for marriage and redesign it themselves. Which begs the question, “Who do we think we are?”

In the grand scheme of things, there are hundreds, even thousands, of moral decisions that we will make over the next few years about what is right or wrong. And with each of these decisions, you and I will have to determine who or what is the final moral authority: our secular culture, our President, the U.S. Supreme Court, Hollywood, our friends and family, ourselves or God’s word.

It goes without saying: the final authority for me is God and His word. Therefore, I must both embrace and speak His truth in love. Even when God’s laws are hard to accept, even when they feel restrictive, even when they go against the flow of our secular culture and nation’s leaders, even when speaking them generates an impassioned backlash from media moguls—God and His word are the final authority in my life. If you call Jesus “Lord,” the same should be true of you.

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages or for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

Marriage Is Good…Really Good!

"He who finds a wife does what is good and receives favor from the LORD." - Proverbs 18:22

Marriage is good. It sounds like a no-brainer, but sadly it’s not. A growing number of American adults—especially young adults—have come to the conclusion that marriage is expendable. Many view marriage as an outdated, archaic institution that needs to be redefined or scrapped altogether.

While most young adults wouldn’t go so far as to say that marriage is “bad,” the statistics speak for themselves: Over the past fifty years marriage rates among young adults (20 to 34 years of age) have declined significantly. One recent study discovered that almost 70% of American men under the age of 35 were unmarried. Many young adults avoid marriage like the plague, choosing instead to pursue inferior options like cohabitation or one-night stands.

Consider this: There is a growing men’s movement in our country called “Men Going Their Own Way,” or MGTOW. Men who have joined this movement believe women are not worth the trouble. They are not opposed to casual sexual encounters with women, but they refuse to commit to any woman. They believe the cost of doing so is too high. MGTOW men pride themselves on not being tied down by a girlfriend, and they adamantly reject Valentine’s Day and other societal pressures to be chivalrous and dote on their ladies. In their view, boxes of chocolates and bouquets of flowers are a complete waste of money.

Does this movement sound ridiculous to you? It should. But it’s symptomatic of a deeper problem. Let’s face it: Our culture celebrates selfish individuality and narcissism while ignoring service and sacrifice. And the repercussions of doing so have been devastating for the American family. A growing number of children are being raised in single parent homes because men have chosen to be sperm donors instead of fathers. Research is conclusive that the likelihood of juvenile delinquency, drug use, gang activity, promiscuity, and dropping out of high school all increase in homes where the father is absent. There should be no doubt that alternatives to traditional marriage have proven themselves to be abysmal failures.

But what does the Bible say? In Genesis 2:18-25, we read of how God created the very first marriage. Many people these days seek to discard marriage without stopping to consider how its Creator designed it in the first place. How foolish! Marriage is a magnificent creation of God, and we need to embrace its original design and purpose as described in Genesis 1 and 2. We discover two created purposes for marriages in these two chapters: companionship and bearing children.

In Genesis 2:18 God focuses on the first of these two purposes as He says, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” The Hebrew word translated as “helper” describes one who comes alongside another for support, for assistance and to shore up his/her weaknesses. Bottom line: Adam was incomplete on his own. By himself he couldn’t be all that God had created Him to be or do all that God had commanded him to do. He needed a perfect companion to provide him with unparalleled fellowship, love and sexual intimacy.

This leads us to the second created purpose for marriage: bearing children. God gave Adam and Eve this command in Genesis 1:28: “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.” This command to have children and fill the earth was so important to God that He repeated it several times in the Book of Genesis. He reiterated this command to Noah in Genesis 8:17, Genesis 9:1 and Genesis 9:7. And in Genesis 11—after people had refused to be fruitful and multiply—the Lord diversified human languages at the Tower of Babel in order to make it so.

You see, people in ancient times resisted God’s command to be fruitful and multiply. And that same resistance is persistent in America today. A growing number of adults who can have children have chosen not to have children, viewing them to be an unnecessary annoyance, burden and restrictor of freedom. Meanwhile, far too many women have chosen to engage in promiscuous sex, ending up with three or four children who all have different dads. How far we have strayed from God’s original design for marriage and the family!

Contrary to popular belief, marriage is not expendable and children are not an unfortunate byproduct of sexual freedom. Quite the opposite: A child is a gift, a joy and a blessing from God. But they are a blessing intended for a committed husband and wife who can raise the child together. Marriage was designed by God to provide a husband and wife with unparalleled companionship and to provide a stable and nurturing environment within which to bear and rear children.

Sadly, as the days go by, many young men and women continue to choose cohabitation, one-night stands and “Going Their Own Way” as alternatives to marriage. But these have always been and always will be inferior alternatives. Marriage is good. Having children is good. And they are designed by God to go hand-in-hand.

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

 

What Makes a Couple Compatible?

“Jesus answered, ‘The most important commandment is this: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’”  

– Mark 12:29-30

One of my primary jobs during pre-marital counseling is to ask couples to answer questions that they never ask each other. Most young couples tend to avoid discussing hot button topics that may lead to disagreements or conflict. Furthermore, they are so focused on the details of their wedding day that they talk very little about the substance of their marriage.

So for years I’ve had a practice of leading a discussion about compatibility on the first day of premarital counseling. Many young couples have bought into the old wives’ tale that—when it comes to finding your lifemate—opposites attract and make the most compatible spouses. But it’s simply not true. The most stable, strong and happy marriages are those in which the husband and wife have the most important things in common: values, beliefs and goals.

Imagine a target with five concentric circles. The inner three circles are where it’s critical for couples to be on the same page. When it comes to compatibility, the bull’s eye is values. Values can be defined as: “What I really care about and what I prioritize.” (We’ll get back to values in a moment.)

The circle just outside the bullseye is beliefs. Beliefs can be defined as: “What I hold to be true.” Each of us holds thousands of different beliefs. For example, I believe that the earth is round, that Pluto is a planet, that the Victor Valley is a good place to live, that the Bible is true and that Jesus Christ is Lord and Savior. And my list of beliefs goes on and on. Although no two people will be in complete agreement with their thousands of different beliefs, husbands and wives need to be on the same page with most of their convictions, especially the ones they hold most dear.

Which leads us to the bull’s eye of compatibility: values. Remember that values refer to the things I deeply care about—what I prioritize. I used to believe that beliefs were the most important area of compatibility, but I’m now convinced that values are even more important. Here’s why. Of the thousands of beliefs that you hold, there are only a handful that you really care about. For example, like me, you may believe that Pluto is a planet, but you probably don’t give Pluto a passing thought on any given day. None of your emotions are wrapped up in Pluto. It isn’t a priority to you. And the same holds true for the vast majority of your other beliefs. There are only a handful of beliefs that you care enough about to prioritize with your time, energy and passion. And the same holds true for every other person.

Many Christian women lament that their husbands express little to no interest in attending church, praying or reading the Bible. When asked if their husbands are Christians, many wives respond, “Yes.” They are convinced that their husbands believe in God and believe that going to church, reading the Bible and praying are all good things. But their husbands’ actions don’t seem to jive with their beliefs. Why not?

The answer boils down to values. Their husbands believe in God, but they don’t love God. Their husbands believe that the Bible is God’s word, but they don’t care enough about it to spend time reading it. They believe in prayer, but they don’t value it as a priority every day. Many engaged couples explore each other’s beliefs. But sadly, very few probe each other’s values.

I advise all dating couples to ask each other deep, values-centered questions like: Who is your first love? What are you really passionate about? If you had a million dollars, how would you spend it? What do you prioritize in your schedule every week regardless of how busy you are? If you could spend the rest of your life doing only one thing, what would it be?

The third circle on the Compatibility Target is goals. Goals describe where a person is heading. Even if a couple is on the same page with their values and beliefs, their marriage will not be compatible if they are heading in opposite directions. If the groom plans to be a missionary in Africa and the bride aims to be a politician, their marriage is bound to be rocky. It’s very important for young couples to explore each other’s goals. Where do you see yourself in five or ten years? Where do you want to live? How many kids do you want to have? What are your financial goals?

Young couples would save themselves a world of hurt if they spent less time planning their weddings and more time determining the compatibility of their values, beliefs and goals. The marriage relationship is designed by God to be the most important and fulfilling human relationship on the planet. And it is intended to be for life. As such, it is not to be entered into lightly. Explore each other’s values, beliefs and goals. And encourage your kids and grandkids to do the same. Happier and healthier marriages are in store for those who do.

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

Is It Wrong for Christians to Drink Alcohol?

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." - 1 Corinthians 10:31

If you want to start a lively debate at church, tell everyone what you think about Christians drinking alcohol. Many Christians-—especially those with roots in the Bible belt-—believe that Christians should never drink alcohol under any circumstances. Other Christians believe that drinking in moderation is part of our freedom in Christ and should be enjoyed without any concerns of conscience.

So, who is correct? Is it okay for Christians to drink alcohol or not? Is it possible to follow and serve Christ with a beer or glass of wine in hand? After studying this issue recently, I’ve become convinced that the most biblical answer is “it depends.”

For starters, it’s important to recognize that we never find a universal “thou-shalt-not-drink-alcohol” command in Scripture. Some Christians who are die-hard abolitionists claim that drinking alcohol under any circumstances is forbidden in Scripture, but that’s simply not true. However, the Bible does give several clear commands that restrict our drinking. Under any of the following four circumstances drinking is a sin.

#1: Drinking alcohol is wrong when it leads to drunkenness. Although the Scriptures never forbid drinking in any and every circumstance, the Scriptures definitely do forbid drunkenness. For example, in Ephesians 5:18 we read: “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead be filled with the Spirit.” Similarly, Galatians 5:21 names drunkenness as an act of the sinful nature.

#2: Drinking alcohol is wrong when it’s against the law. God’s word makes it very clear in passages like Romans 13:1-2 that the Lord expects us to obey the laws of the land. Therefore, we are compelled as Christians to obey the laws regarding drinking that exist in our city, county and state. For example, in California it is against the law for minors to drink alcohol under any circumstances, even while at home under the supervision of a parent or guardian. Therefore, when teenagers in our state drink, it is an act of rebellion against both the laws of our land and God Himself.

#3: Drinking alcohol is wrong when it’s in defiance of your conscience. In Romans 14:14 the Apostle Paul writes, “I am fully convinced that no food is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean.” Paul could just as easily have said, “I am fully convinced that no wine or beer is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards alcohol as unclean, then for him it is unclean.” So, it’s clear from this verse that if you have a conscience issue with drinking alcohol, then under no circumstance should you drink. To defy your God-given conscience is sin.

#4: Drinking alcohol is wrong when it causes someone else to stumble into sin. Paul writes in Romans 14:20, “It is wrong for a man to do anything that causes someone else to stumble.” Even though I may be able to drink a beer, glass of wine or margarita responsibly, the person across from me at the table or in the booth next to me may not be able to do the same. I realize that drinking is contagious, and I don’t want to be anyone’s excuse for ordering an extra drink themselves. I may be able to call it quits after one drink, but the person across the table from me may not be able to do so. I may be able to drive home safely with a low blood-alcohol level, but the stranger across the room perhaps cannot.

The reality is that problem drinking is at epidemic levels in our country today. According to CBN.com, there are some twenty million problem drinkers in the United States today, and according to another source, 3.3 million of these problem drinkers are high school students. The Center for Disease Control (CDC) estimates that each year in our country 2.7 million doctors’ visits, 1.2 million ER visits and 88,000 deaths are alcohol-related. Sadly, alcohol is involved in approximately ½ of all homicides, ½ of all domestic violence arrests, ½ of all crimes leading to incarceration, ½ of all birth defects and ¼ of all suicides.

Without a doubt problem drinking has produced a tidal wave of misery in our country. This cannot be disputed. So, I have come to the conclusion that even if I drink responsibly in moderation, the negatives of doing so far outweigh the positives. For that reason, I have chosen to err on the side of caution and practice abstinence.

However, if you are able to drink responsibly without breaching one of the four aforementioned conditions, then drinking falls underneath your freedom in Christ. You are welcome to do so. But make sure that as you drink, you do so with a thankful heart and with God’s glory in mind. All Christians-—both those who practice temperance and those who drink in moderation—-are compelled by God to obey 1 Corinthians 10:31: “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.

Jesus Was a Lousy Rabbi

"The Samaritan woman said to him, 'You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?' (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.)" - John 4:9 

No self-respecting rabbi would have ever done what Jesus did. Not only had he chosen to travel through Samaria—a region devout Jews in Jesus’ day avoided like the plague—he had done the unthinkable. He spoke to a Samaritan woman in a public setting, and all indications are that she was a woman of questionable repute. Was she a prostitute? Probably not, but even among her own Samaritan neighbors, she was likely a social outcast. Yet Jesus chose to chat with her as if she were a fellow rabbi.

Jesus’ disciples couldn’t believe their ears. Didn’t Jesus know that this woman could destroy his reputation? The Samaritan woman herself couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Her head must have swiveled like an owl’s—looking right to left making sure that Jesus was actually talking to her and not to someone else. But there was no one else. This Jewish rabbi was starting a conversation with her, and she didn’t know what to make of it.

You see, in Jesus’ day the majority of Jewish rabbis considered the Samaritans to be half-breeds. They weren’t fully Gentile, but they weren’t fully Jewish either. More than seven hundred years earlier, the mighty Assyrian army had swept into Samaria and conquered the ten Jewish tribes who lived there. And there was a certain policy in Assyria’s nation-conquering playbook that would change these ten Jewish tribes forever.

Unlike the Babylonians who conquered the remaining two Jewish tribes 135 years later, the Assyrians had a practice of intermarrying with the citizens of a conquered nation. They believed that the best way to squash any future rebellions within a conquered nation was to destroy their national identity. And the best way to do this, in their view, was to intermarry with them.

The Jewish people prided themselves in having pure Jewish bloodlines that could be traced all the way back to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. But as a result of Assyrian intermarriage, the Samaritans were hybrids: part Jewish, part Gentile. So in the centuries following the Assyrian conquest, the people of Samaria became social outcasts. When traveling from northern Israel (Galilee) to southern Israel (Judah), most Jewish rabbis in Jesus’ day chose to take the long route around Samaria to ensure that Samaritan dust wouldn’t stick to the bottom of their sandals.

Yet Jesus traipsed right through the middle of Samaria. Why? Why would a Jewish rabbi do something that was so countercultural, so socially unacceptable, so reckless for a rabbi whose reputation was already being questioned by the powers that be? He did it because Jesus loved people—regardless of whether or not their bloodline was “pure,” regardless of whether or not their past was checkered, regardless of whether or not socializing with them might tarnish his own reputation.

You see, in Jesus’ view people are ministry priority #1. He is more willing to wade through a cesspool of nasty accusations and rejection than he is to allow one lost sheep to stay lost. So, he asked the Samaritan woman politely for a drink…then used the opportunity to offer her the “living water” of a restored relationship with God.

Many Jewish leaders who heard about Jesus’ actions that day must have grimaced in absolute disgust and thought to themselves, “Jesus is the worst rabbi ever!”  But at the end of the day, Jesus really didn’t care. He was too busy celebrating the fact that one lost sheep had returned to the fold. This woman who was—for all intents and purposes—spiritually dead had come to life again. And her new life was contagious.

As we read John 4, we can learn several important tips for sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with individuals who, like the Samaritan woman, are spiritually parched. Tip #1: Treat people with respect. Even social outcasts need to be valued and respected. Jesus threw all social protocol to the wind in order to speak to the Samaritan woman with respect. And it worked! Tip #2: Quench people’s spiritual thirst. Once Jesus grabbed this woman’s attention by treating her with respect, he identified a deep need that she had and told her how he himself could fill that need. Did he have her attention? Without a doubt! She was hanging on his every word.

Tip #3: Make others' needs a higher priority than your own needs. Was Jesus tired and in need of rest? Absolutely! Was Jesus hungry? Without a doubt! But getting rest and stuffing his face with dinner wasn’t his highest priority. The Samaritan woman was. And as he made her a higher priority than himself, her life was transformed by the power of the gospel message. Her life was permanently changed by her encounter with Jesus, and so too will many other lives as we follow in Jesus’ footsteps.

As you share the good news of Jesus with those who are looking for God’s love in all the wrong places, treat them with respect. Lovingly share how Jesus alone can quench their deep-seated spiritual thirst. And put their needs above your own. You may lose some sleep and miss a meal or two. Your reputation may even take a hit among the religious snobs. But in the long run, who cares? Regardless of the personal cost, Jesus came to seek and save the lost. Who are you to do otherwise? 

Dane Davis is the lead pastor of First Christian Church of Victorville and the author of Holy Huldah! Lessons You Should Never Forget from Bible Characters You've Never Heard Of. To hear Pastor Dane's messages for for more information about the church, visit www.fccvv.com.